Just wanted to grab your attention, and tell you this is a new post, so don’t turn the page yet!

“Stuff To Live By?”

Accept that some days you’re the pigeon, and some days you’re the statue.

Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors, and miss.

Cooking lesson #1: don’t fry bacon in the nude.

Drive carefully. It’s not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.

Eat a live toad in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you for the rest of the day.

If life gives you lemons, squeeze the juice into a water gun and shoot other people in the eyes.

If you’re not part of the solution, be part of the problem!

If you can’t be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

If you can’t beat your computer at chess, try kick boxing.

If you try and don’t succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.

It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

Never buy a car you can’t push.

Never eat yellow snow.

Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you don’t have a leg to stand on.

Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.

The early worm gets eaten by the bird, so sleep late.

There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives.

When everything’s coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.

Disclaimer: this comedic jewel is meant for soley comedic purposes… :o)

The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for blood
plasma.

No piece of paper can be folded in half more than seven (7) times.

Donkeys kill more people annually than plane crashes.

You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching television.

Oak trees do not produce acorns until they are fifty (50) years of age or
older.

The first product to have a bar code was Wrigley’s gum.

The king of hearts is the only king without a mustache.

American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by
eliminating one (1) olive from each salad served in first-class.

Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking
you up in the morning.

Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin.

The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer.
So did the first “Marlboro Man.”

Walt Disney was afraid of mice.

Pearls melt in vinegar.

The three most valuable brand names on earth: Coca Cola, Microsoft, and IBM in that order.

It is possible to lead a cow upstairs…but not downstairs.

Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush be kept at least six (6) feet
away from a toilet to avoid airborne particles resulting from the
flush.

Richard Millhouse Nixon was the first U.S. president whose name
contains all the letters from the word “criminal.” The second?
William Jefferson Clinton.

And the best for last…..
Turtles can breathe through their butts.

i know, i know… it’s definitely time for an update… so here one is. We went to the American Idol Concert on Sunday, and it was a blast… Taylor really is the winner… he has soooo much talent! Anyway, i’ll post pics ‘o that later. For now go check out the website bethanyblairdesigns.com. It’s pretty much up and running and has a substantial gallery page of stuff we’ve done. Right now, we’re working on a page for ZsaZsaZsu Day Spa, so when that’s up and running, i’ll put a link, too. You can also check out Lighthouse Painting… we’ve added some stuff since my first post about it. For anyone who’s into Piper and Itunes… check out the podcast, Desiring God Radio. Or just do a search for “Desiring God” in Itunes….. Umm, so that’s it for now… Peace out.

Oh hey… if anyone has a sweet Mac Laptop they wanna sell me for a great deal, email me. :o)